


OCDirk

by epochryphal



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Neurodiversity, Obsessive-Compulsive, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-16
Updated: 2014-07-16
Packaged: 2018-02-09 03:11:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1966788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/epochryphal/pseuds/epochryphal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Snapshots of domestic Dirk living with xir body symmetry / tactile OCD.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This particular type of OCD, my brand--I never see mentioned, much less written into stories. So.

Ball of left foot touches floor seam, flash-step and ball of right foot touches the next but the angle is off about two degrees, flash-step left foot at the new angle flash right foot at the old, almost but you leaned on your left more so flash left heel flash right heavier heel, now you’ve put too much weight at the back of the right so flash heavy left heel flash light right heel flash light left ball flash heavy right ball, calculating averages and it’s getting large enough that the limit of the ratio approaches one and that’ll do but it still isn’t perfect, it’s never perfect and you are so incredibly exhausted and you just wanted a soda from the fridge.

Soda in hand, you walk—numbers ticking away, inner balance gauge nudging up and down; sure you aren’t a Libra?—back to your desk chair and collapse in its well-worn Dirk-shaped groove, dead center.

You pop open the can, sigh, and crack your neck, right, then left. Hm. 2.5:1.0 means redo. This one’s 2.0:1.5, which is better but totals 4.5:2.5, so one more time with fingers to help, another 2.0:1.5, summing to 6.5:4. You almost shake your head to dismiss the findings as adequate, but catch yourself and keep your neck balanced.

Sip.

You realize something might be wrong when you accidentally graze your left leg during sword practice and your first instinct is to slice a mirror-image on the right.


	2. Chapter 2

It’s dental checkup time, so you floss and make your way over to the office. Your hygiene is impeccable as always; body maintenance isn’t nearly as difficult as mechanical, and the repercussions and repair options are a lot more restricted, so you’re mindful of your fleshy vessel. Never a cavity yet.

"Dirk," the dentist interjects. "Do you grind your teeth?"

"No," you respond instantly, already flashing through memory banks and examining any possible subconscious mutiny. Shit. "Maybe," you amend, leaving out the bit about how you’re constantly adjusting your jaw so the contact points between upper and lower teeth match left and right, placewise and pressure too. Not gonna delve into body symmetry OCD with a dentist.

"Because I’m seeing some erosion of the enamel here, and that’s usually caused by grinding. Not everyone’s aware of it. You might want to consider a nightguard."

Or better meds, you don’t quip back. Sleep is probably the one time you DON’T have to worry about the constant vigilant readjusting. Although, that does bear checking into; you can configure a camera when you get home.

"See here," the dentist is saying, brandishing two photos of your mouth-bones. "These yellow spots are where the white of the enamel has been worn away to start exposing the layer beneath, the dentin. The wear is a little worse on the left side, as you can see, and…"

You blank. Worse on…the left side? That. Shouldn’t be possible. The entire origin of this was balance, was even distribution, was to make neither side better or worse or different in any way whatsoever. For that to result in lopsidedness meant your perceptions were miscalibrated. Meant you had some serious readjusting to do.

You reach up half-consciously and touch your right eyebrow, then your left. Touch seems to confirm they’re both plucked to perfect symmetry, a few hairs left intact and mirrored exactly - but you can no longer rely on touch as an accurate instrument, it seems. Vision, then. You’ve already adjusted for ocular imperfection with impartial optometry, with objective, mechanical alteration and optimization. It should be simple to devise a device to see into your mouth and determine levels of wear and a plan for equilibration.

The dentist visit concludes with any further ado, and you find yourself walking out without correcting the receptionist’s gendering, your whole body set in grim determination.


End file.
